Get in Shape (Without Hating It)
Last summer, when Danielle was temporarily assigned to Virginia, my goal was to hit the streets of Newport on the bike with Sean in the toddler seat and train for an organized ride in the spring. I crashed and burned. I was in worse shape than I’d thought, and riding with an extra 30 pounds over the back tire took all the fun out of it.
Over the years, I have learned something interesting about myself as a man: I am �spatially challenged.� It�s OK; I�ve accepted it. As a man, I�m not alone. A lot of men are puzzled by interior design. (What does �feng shui� mean, again?) I read somewhere that, because of ancient hunter-gatherer societies in which women gathered foods like herbs, roots, and mushrooms, while men hunted game, women evolved to be more spatially sensitive than men. This is why, when husbands ask their wives where the remote control is (or the peanut butter or the car keys), their wives know.
We have a brand new little human in the house. Quiet and sleep are a rarity.
So why, the other night, did I feel guilty calling the police on my noisy college student neighbors at 3 a.m.? After all, we’d been listening to them since 11 p.m., and I’d already been over there once to ask them to be quiet. Why did I speak so softly into the receiver, as if I was worried the kids next door would hear me ratting them out?
Danielle and I started life together approximately $50,000 in debt. About $30,000 of that consisted of student loans. The other $20,000 belonged to credit cards. There are a lot of things on which I could blame this situation � inexperience, aggressive credit card marketing, high tuition � but at the center of them all is a grand illusion we�ve all faced and believed in at one time or another. This is the illusion of the Money Tree.
Fashion Philosophy for Male Spouses
Fashion savvy becomes an area of continuous struggle for male spouses during deployments. This is especially true for stay-at-home-dads and telecommuters. Without our wives around to keep us civilized, men tend to devolve to a sort of caveman existence. We attend to basic needs like eating and sleeping, but we grow neck beards and forego the barbershop. Occasionally, we shower. Maybe.
